Seriously you need free advice? In India it’s very easy to get free advice, even everyone of use get it every day without asking. Isn’t it like that?
But (not going to write any highly intense line….!!!!!) when you need it to overcome your challenges then those advisers suddenly disappear.
Today let’s figure out how to give good advice (please correct me via your comments if I am wrong):-
- It’s harder than it looks: In first sight its look like an easy task (like advising while watching cricket match), but in realty it’s not that easy. Because to give a good advice you first need to understand the challenge of that person, you need to put yourself into his/her shoe. Once you understand the issue then only might be you can give a good advice.
- Developing a Same Page Understanding: On this very initial phase, if you are an advice seeker your goal will be to share/convey enough information to your adviser so that he can grasp your challenge. But as an Adviser you need to ask yourself that weather you are a right fit or not, can you dedicate enough time and effort to attend the seekers problem? As an adviser your approach to find the answer of this question is very important, else you can create more complications in his life (Surely no one wants to do that).
- Creating Alternatives: Seekers and Advisers should work together to come up with more than one possibility. Even go/no-go decisions yield improved results when nuanced alternatives are described and considered. Being the adviser, think of yourself as a driving instructor. While you provide oversight and guidance, your ultimate goal is to empower the seeker to act independently.
- Converging on a decision: When time comes to narrow down the course of actions, most of the time seekers become little bias and want to pick an ‘easy way out’. Here as an Adviser it’s your responsibility to guide him and convey him all the possible outcomes of each decision, which he is going to made. Your goal at this stage is to work with the seeker to explore all the options at hand before she makes a choice. Talk through the most likely outcomes of each possibility, assessing the relative pros and cons and ensuring that the conversation remains a dialogue rather than a monologue.
- Action Time: Since you are the adviser, step back from the process at this stage. Reaffirm that it’s up to the seeker to move forward. Both the decision and the consequences are his, not yours, and must be recognised as such. That will help ensure personal accountability and prevent misplaced blame if things don’t work out as hoped. But remain open to providing additional guidance as events unfold. Especially in fluid, rapidly changing situations, even the best advice can quickly become irrelevant.